Handling Critique

You said what? Boring? You want me to re-write? Do you have any idea how long I spent on this scene?

Yes, admit it. Some of us have reacted in a similar lackluster way toward someone who has critiqued our work in progress. Whether it is your parents, your significant other, a classmate, workmate, your editor. Let me try and simplify things: if you cannot handle critiquing, input, advice, suggestions, or constructive criticism of any sort—don’t write. In fact, your inability to be taught will follow you in life and you will complain, fuss, and &@!$ at any type of support given to you.

Rule: If you want to be a good writer, darn good writer, or an excellent writer…listen to others, especially those more seasoned than you.

If dealing in a specific genre, editors and publishers have tons of experience in your field and only want you to get better. That’s their job, to help you. I hired a freelance editor, Susanne Lakin, to help me in my early start. By printing out her editing, I created a notebook with her suggestions and corrections. Before you know it, tada!—a study guide. I thank God for her. She is awesome. After contracting with MuseItUp Publishing, I was blessed again with a fantastic staff that critiqued me from the owner, Lea Schizas to the cover artist, Delilah K. Stephens. My God, you are being worked over around every corner! And I am better for it.

Be willing to take instruction. Gather several views of input and compare all of them as you move through your story. You may find similarities in what they saw, or insight to things you were totally blind to.

Now, there is another side to this. Don’t give your story to someone who has no idea of what you are writing about. If they don’t read, if they are jealous, if they have no concept of writing anything, avoid them. I would not ask advice from a vacuum salesperson on how to fix my roof. Duh. At times, these people may have some good advice, but make sure it is not a ton of notes pertaining to their preference instead of an honest, constructive critique. If they want a story to go their way, have them write it!

The bottom line is this: be open and humble to listen to others. I’ve had one word said to me by someone unexpected who dropped by my office, and it set the tone for a positive day. Despite your humbleness, also remember it is your story. You may be adamant in having a scene go a certain way, but with another set of eyes, perhaps you can still have the same destiny taken on another route. Take care.

Nick G. Giannaras

relicsofnanthara.weebly.com

nuclearfist.weebly.com

New Release!

It's been a really long week around here, but there was one high point. Jet Black, book 3 in my young adult urban fantasy series The Dark Lines, released from Featherweight Press!

I've been waiting for this one to come out. The book was originally scheduled for release in January, but a publisher change led to it being pushed back to this month. I'm hoping readers will be looking forward to finding out what happens next to Topher James and his half-brother Blake Walker in their fight against the force of darkness that is trying to destroy them and their friends. Here's the blurb and a short excerpt:

With the help of their new friend Misty, Topher James and his friends must fight a force of darkness. But is Misty really on their side?

When Topher James and Blake Walker receive an email from a girl named Misty saying that "something dark" has taken her sister, they know they will have to once again fight the force of darkness they've fought before. The nightmares Topher's girlfriend Callie Monroe is having confirm that, and also warn against becoming involved with Misty. But something about Misty sucks Topher in, and he's unable to resist her.

Alienated from Callie and his friends because of Misty, Topher still intends to fight the darkness. But it---and Misty---have other plans, and only Faith Carlisle can make Topher see the light before it's too late.

“I’ll see you later.” I wasn’t staying to hear any more of Blake’s crap. That was what I got for trying to make him feel better.

“Topher, please don’t go,” Faith said. “You’re too angry to drive safely, for one thing.”

“Of course I’m angry!” I shouted. She flinched, and this time I didn’t care. “Misty’s my friend, and I’m sick of all of you trying to turn me against her.”

“I was wrong.” Blake sounded almost surprised. “The darkness told me it would turn one of us against the others. I thought it meant me. But it didn’t, did it, Topher?”

As soon as he said it, his eyes widened. He knew he’d gone too far. And it was too late for him to take it back.

“Nice, Blake,” I snapped. “Not only is Misty working with the darkness, now I am too? I’m glad you trust me so much. Don’t bother trying to contact me. If you can’t trust me, I don’t need your help. I’ll deal with the dark presence myself.”

I stormed to the car, got in, and took off, leaving a trail of rubber behind.

I had no idea where I was going, just that I had to get away from Blake and Faith. They had to have been talking behind my back, planning to drop this bomb on me. I wanted to know how long they’d been plotting. And how long ago they’d decided to stop trusting me.

I was too angry to be hurt by their betrayal. They would see when I fought the darkness and won. They would see that they should have trusted me all along.

Consciously, I might not have had a destination in mind, but somewhere inside I knew just where to go. A while later, I stopped in front of the alley. Misty was there, standing against one of the buildings like she’d been waiting for me. She smiled when I left the car. A look of concern quickly replaced the smile when I walked over to her. “Topher, what’s wrong?”

“Come for a ride with me.” I held out my hand.

She took it. A chill went through me despite the warmth of the day. I ignored it and we went to the car.

As I drove away, Misty asked again, “What’s wrong?”

“Do you ever have the feeling there’s no one you can trust?” I muttered.

“All the time.” She rested her hand on my arm. “Tell me about it.”

I told her everything. Callie breaking up with me, what Blake and the others had said about me. I stopped short of telling her what Blake had accused her of, though. She wanted to help me, and I refused to repay that by hurting her. As I talked, I drove aimlessly through the city, not really paying attention to where we were until I came to a hill that overlooked the bay. I stopped there, not because of the view but because I was too upset to drive anymore.

I put the car in park and let go of the steering wheel. I was suddenly tired, so tired I wanted to close my eyes and sleep right there. I didn’t, only because Misty was with me and she wanted to help me. “I thought they were my friends,” I said. “I thought I could trust them. Now it turns out they’ve been saying all this stuff behind my back. How can they treat me this way?”

“I understand,” Misty said softly. She took my hand. “I know exactly what it’s like, Topher. Don’t worry about them. They aren’t worth it. I’m your friend. If you can’t trust them, trust me.”

She leaned a little closer to me. Without thinking, I turned to her and kissed her. What she’d said was true. She was my friend. I could trust her.

As I kissed her, I felt the darkness in her. The darkness Blake had told me about. Maybe he’d been right about her, but I didn’t care.

She was all I had now.

Jet Black is available from Featherweight Press.
Books one and two in the series, The Black Bridge and When Darkness Falls, are available from Jupiter Gardens Press.

Reckless An American Hero

Since most YAers are animal lovers, I'd like to share an email that was sent to me. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

The true "War Horse"

This is the story of "Reckless," the mare.

"This horse was a pack horse during the Korean war, and she
carried recoil-less rifles, ammunition and supplies to
Marines. Nothing too unusual about that, lots of animals
got pressed into doing pack chores in many wars.

But this horse did something more. During the battle for
a location called Outpost Vegas, this mare made 51 trips
up and down the hill. On the way up she carried
ammunition, and on the way down she carried wounded
soldiers.

What was so amazing? Well, she made every one of those
trips without anyone leading her.

One can imagine a horse carrying a wounded soldier, being
smacked on the rump at the top of the hill, and heading
back to the "safety" of the rear. But to imagine the same
horse, loaded with ammunition, and trudging back to the
battle where artillery is going off, without anyone
leading her is unbelievable. To know that she would make
50 of those trips is unheard of. How many horses would
even make it back to the barn once, let alone return to
the soldiers in the field even a single time?

Here is a clip of her story and photos to prove where she
was and what she did.

Reckless was retired at the Marine Corps Base in Camp
Pendleton where a General issued the following order:
"She was never to carry any more weight on her back except
her own blankets." She died in 1968 at the age of 20.

P.S. How bad was the battle for Outpost Vegas? Artillery
rounds fell at the rate of 500 per hour, and only two men
made it out alive without wounds. Just two. And also a
horse, and she was wounded twice."

Luck o' the Irish

Couldn't resist this pic as it reminded me so much of my heroine Annie in "Angel in the Mist." Annie heads from Ireland to America during the potato famine. And she becomes an angel, in more ways than one.

I've been taking a class where we're learning literary devices. So a new and (hopefully) improved version of one of the paragraphs from "Angel in the Mist" now includes epistrophe:

"Annie comforted herself that the money she'd earn could keep her family alive. The shriveled, blackened potatoes could not. Her da, curled on a pallet, choking his lungs out could not. Her ma lying cold under the sod could not. Her younger brothers, smudged with coal dust, backs bent like old men’s, could not. But she could. She, Annie, could be their savior."

Can you find the epistrophe? If you guessed it was the repeated phrasing "could not" at the end of the sentences, you're right. It's also called "antistrophe."

I also discovered I'd also included pleonasm, a redundancy used for emphasis. Both words in "She, Annie" aren't strictly necessary, but I used them for effect. There are a few other devices in that paragraph. Can you identify them?

I also enjoyed learning other devices, some of which I use instinctively. One I found fascinating is chiasmus (ky-AZ-mus). The names of most of these literary devices come from the Greek, and this is no exception. It comes from the letter "chi," which looks like an "X." Just as the two arms of the "X" are crossed, so, too, are the words in chiasmus.

For example, "the first shall be last, and the last shall be first." (Matthew 20:16)

Another fun device is litotes (lie-TOE-teez). It's using a double negative in place of a positive. For example, his political views were not uncontested by the crowd. It would be simpler to write that people contested his views, but written the former way, it has a subtle, and different, shade of meaning.

What rhetorical devices do you use in your writing? If you aren't sure what a rhetorical device is, you can check out this website: Virtual Salt. If you haven't used any, try a few to perk up your writing.

Where Am I?

Setting isn't coincidence. The other day in the midst of my promo whirl, I was asked (in an interview) why I chose that particular setting for my novel. Of course, I 'knew'why I'd chosen it, but still the question made me stop and think.

The novel is my YA 'Dead, Actually' and it's set on the Gold Coast, Australia. Situated on the south-eastern corner of the state of Queensland known for its sunshine, beaches and tropical fruit, to name just a teeny few of its glorious attractions, the Gold Coast is one of the most beautiful places on earth. It's both glitzy and glamorous, and tacky and tawdry - the perfect place for my characters who are all sparkly on the outside but who all harbour their dark secrets.

In this case the setting echoed the story.

I believe the choice of setting in a story is, if not crucial to its success, then at least very, very important, and I spend as much time thinking about that as I do character. It is an integral part of the story, sometimes so powerfully so that it becomes almost another character. Would Harry Potter have been as compelling if JK Rowling hadn't also created Hogwarts? In Lauren Kate's novel, 'Fallen', the Sword and Cross School was eerie and disturbing - and added greatly to the dark mood of the story. And it's a no-brainer that Louis Sacher's 'Holes' couldn't have succeeded as well as it did without that setting which was indeed part of the plot.

I've used setting in many ways and quite often as a foil for the heroine. In Princesses Don't Sweat, my uptown, spoiled NY princess was dumped in the harsh, unforgiving Australian Outback. The premise was comedic in nature, but the deeper story was that, with her life seemingly spinning out of control, she had to find herself. So again, the choice of setting was very deliberate, and in this case metaphorical. I employed a similar mindset when I sent my Californian Beach girl off to the snowfields in My Life as a Snow Bunny. For me, putting a character who is suffering some inner turmoil into an unfamiliar setting helps me tell the story, and is a subtle way of adding richness and depth.

What do you think? Agree? Not? Is setting as important to you as it is to me? And as a reader, does setting matter to you? Do you have favourite destinations?

Writing Novels vs The Short Stuff

Hey everyone! Hope you guys are great. This weeks marks a very special event in my life - the prelaunch tour for my debut into YA fiction, LACRIMOSA. Yes, I have a novella out already. But I really consider my novel to be my first big venture into YA. Be sure to check out my other blog and my tour to learn about the novel, the series, and get in on many fabulous giveaways.

But first, this post. In preparing the series to go to print, my publisher and I decided to introduce readers to the world of Celestium and my angels through a prequel novella, DIES IRAE. We wanted something under 100 pages that we would price incredibly low. The novella format seemed to meet that need - almost.

What do I mean by that? Let me start by explaining what a novella actually is. Strictly speaking, a novella is longer than a novelette and shorter than a novel. It averages 15-40K in length. The storyline is far more complex than a short story, but far less complex than a novel. There are typically less plotlines and less conflict than in a novel, and the story typically ends at the brink of change. Most of the “novels” we were required to read in school—titles like Animal Farm, Of Mice and Men, and The War of the Worlds—are actually novellas. The same is true of some other novels we have come to love—Coraline, A Christmas Carole, and The Metamorphosis.

Now that we have a definition of a novella, how did I go about writing DIES IRAE. Honestly, exactly the same way I write a novel. I stewed on the storyline I wanted to tell, planned out the beats, and started to write. I originally planned on staying with one central plot—the romance between two of the characters. But I failed. Miserably. So, I added back my secondary plot thread as it was THE motivation behind one of the central character’s actions.

As much as the process of drafting and editing a novella was essentially similar to that of a novel, there were some differences that made me work—hard!  For one, there was the whole world building, character building piece. There is no room for excess of each, leaving my early drafts a combination of too wordy in some places, and too vague in others. I’m certain it drove my poor beta readers crazy. My edits consisted of pouring over the language over and over and over again, carefully choosing each and every word, each and every scene, each and every cadence. Much like writing poetry, there was no room for lazy language or lazy story telling.

Some people have really enjoyed the novella, others have not. And the main frustration from those that have not embraced DIES IRAE has had to do with depth and length - both things inherent in the genre. Hopefully readers will feel more satisfied with LACRIMOSA. I guess time will tell on that front.

In the end, I have discovered a love for both formats - shorts and novels. And I have no doubt you will be seeing more novelettes, novellas, and novels with this series.

What do you guys think? Do you have a preference between novels and the short stuff? What about teen readers? Do you think they have a preference?

Have You Ever Tried to Write a Whole Book of Free Verse?

A number of us writers are poets as well as novelists, and I too have dabbled in poetry. I haven’t tried to publish much of it because only a few markets will take such work, although I have had a couple of poems published in an offbeat literary collection. Recently, I became aware of the numbers of YA novels that are written in free verse. Free verse means that the length of lines in the poem are variable with no fixed metrical pattern and with rhythm (rather than rhyme) as a central organizer.

I have found a number of examples, including:

Crank by Ellen Hopkins
Love and Leftovers by Sarah Tregay
After the Kiss by Terra Elan McVoy
Far From You by Lisa Schroeder
Because I Am Furniture by Thalia Chaltas
The Geography of Girlhood by Kirsten Smith
Glimpse by Carol Lynch Williams

But there are many, more complete lists:

http://www.goodreads.com/list/show/2212.YA_Novels_in_Verse

http://www.connectedyouth.org/books/index.cfm?booklist=verse

http://www.amazon.com/YA-Novels-In-Verse/lm/R1C2WQ5EOJ3X1G

http://www.readinasinglesitting.com/2010/10/18/list-young-adult-novels-in-verse/

http://susanwrites.livejournal.com/31126.html

One observation from researching this particular format is that many of these books have “issues” at their hearts. In Love and Leftovers, for instance, the protagonist has recently learned that her father is gay and her mother suffers from depression while she negotiates a new school and romance. My hypothesis is that the transformation of painful matters into lyricism is a way for readers to experience them in a way that is both manageable and satisfying.

Another observation is that free verse novels can be attractive to reluctant readers. On one hand, this surprises me because verse seems a more sophisticated format to understand. On the other hand, the books are shorter. After all, the website Read in a Single Setting featured a list of young adult novels in verse (above). I estimated the number of words in Love and Leftovers and came out to about 20,000, which is at least 30,000 words shorter than even the low end word count for YA novels these days. I also wondered if perhaps reluctant readers don’t have to understand literally what the poem means; perhaps it just conveys the essence of the meaning and they can find this enthralling in itself.

I have an “issues” book that was termed a bit too “heavy” by editors because sexual abuse was included, but I am thinking of taking out the sexual abuse and leaving in the other “issues,” family and mental health problems, and writing it as free verse. Some of the challenges I foresee in such a project:

1) Plot vs. Pretty: I imagine plot is secondary to the expression of language, but still things need to happen in a certain order. Can this be conveyed to the reader? Does plot suffer?

2) Too Episodic: Because poems are generally shorter than scenes or chapters would be, does a work become too chopped up and episodic as a result?

3) What is Going on? Because poems are symbolic and not literal, how will readers know what’s going on? I saw this in Amazon reader comments of particular YA verse books, that reviewers weren’t always sure what the poems were trying to convey, although it didn’t seem to bother them much either.

What do you think? Have you ever read a YA novel in free verse? Did you enjoy it? Why or why not? Have you tried writing in this format? What do you see as the challenges?

Have a good weekend!

Jacqueline Corcoran
http://www.jacquelinecorcoran.com/
TIME WITCH